RuPaul's Drag Race: Reunited!

In which we learn why Sonique had such a discontented stinkface for most of her stay, Mystique is out of her goddamned mind, Shangela went and turned it out while still using corn as an accessory, Morgan is only a poseur whore and don't you dare say anything different, Sahara is living mo' money mo' problems, Jessica is under $5 on the right day at Denny's, Pandora is even nice to her worst enemies, Tatianna finally gets her own raging flamethrower bitch moment, Raven surprises no one by not giving a damn, and Tyra basically won because RuPaul has transcended all logic and common sense to achieve a higher plane of existence where you don't have to stand up to bullies and walking a runway on your knees, jumping up without support, and crying behind a veil means that you are qualified to be the next drag superstar. BULLSHIT!

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RuPaul's Drag Race 2-11 "The Grand Finale"

In which SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!

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RuPaul's Drag Race 2-9 "The Diva Awards"

In which there is a dearth of Thundering Drumbeats And Silences, Tyra resorts to manufacturing an entire dress in order to play with people's minds, Tatianna contracts Shannel Syndrome because Raven is a diseased carrier (surprise, surprise), Merle Ginsberg is fucking hallucinating during the runway presentations now, and for the bargain price of $3.99, you too can own Jujubee's soul!

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RuPaul's Drag Race 2-8 "Golden Gals"

In which BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

RuPaul's Drag Race 2-7 "Once Upon A Queen"

In which Raven almost has her perfect day at Tatianna's expense, the racism line is sorely tested with Jujubee, Pandora takes some seriously out-of-line shit from Santino and responds admirably, which is apparently the story of her life, Jessica gets craaaaaaaaaaazy drunk on Absolut Berry ASAYEEEE! and Tyra wants you to believe that she used to be a mean, arrogant bitch. The same way that Mel Gibson used to be an anti-Semite, or Scientologists used to be out of their goddamned minds. Naturally.

RuPaul's Drag Race 2-6 "Rocker Chicks"

In which Raven's delusions of awesomeness actually work in her favor, Tatianna finds an outfit that is unflattering *and* trampy, Sahara pirouettes one too many times, RuPaul, Merle, and Santino's idea of dressing like a rocker is biker/rookie S&M bitch gear, Tyra doesn't know any musicians who have not previously been associated in some way with Beyoncé, and Jujubee chokes, hard. Which is especially bad, considering that this is a singing challenge this week.

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RuPaul's Drag Race 2-5 "Here Comes The Bride"

In which Lazy Entitled Self-Deluded Good-For-Nothing Tyra goes too far and gets her dumb ass exposed, no one really shares Sahara's particular fantasies about her gay wedding, even Pandora gets dangerously close to being on the verge, a useless twat with a stupidified name and a fondness for mixing period costumes invades the judging panel, and Team Resident Evil gets a nickname just in time to be torn apart.

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